Living With A Significant Other – A Year Later
Wednesday, January 18, 2017
It's been approximately fifteen months since I moved in with my boyfriend of three years (well, three years next month) and I thought I'd share with you some of the things I have learnt, the best and worst things about living together, and finally whether it's all worth it.
Side note: if you want to read my blog post about moving in with my boyfriend, chick here!
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The best bits:
- Being able to see each other a whole lot more
- Spooning every night!
- Cooking meals together; including the classic hugging-from-behind-as-the-other-is-cooking-dinner pose
- Getting a kiss and a "have a great day at ___" every time I leave the house
- Heart-to-heart conversations at night
The not-so-great bits:
- He is a loud video gamer and I don't like to wear headphones to block him out, which can frustrate the both of us
- Different sleeping schedules
- Different tastes in scents (he hates overly sweet candles, I hate the smell of most foods)
- Different tastes in foods; my overly pickiness, intolerance to gluten and plain pallet compared to him being able to eat anything (most things) under the sun
- He can survive on about six to seven hours sleep, whereas I need about nine to ten to be functional
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What we've learnt about me:
- I've discovered that I used to be a whole lot more independent when I was single, but now I'm in a relationship I want to spend all (well, most) of my time with him
- He has learnt that not all girls are really neat and tidy, and that I am just as messy as he is with my belongings
- He has learnt a lot more about mental health through watching me work my way through it (I used to hide it away and cry by myself at night, but now I have him to share my experiences with)
- He has learnt that not all girls are really neat and tidy, and that I am just as messy as he is with my belongings
- He has learnt a lot more about mental health through watching me work my way through it (I used to hide it away and cry by myself at night, but now I have him to share my experiences with)
What we've learnt about him:
- He has learnt that even though I can frustrate him, but he is able to learn hoe to channel his frustration into something more constructive than anger (yelling doesn't fix anything, you need to calmly discuss your issues!)
- He has learnt how difficult it can be to juggle lots of big things in his life; keeping on top of work as well as university was pretty full on, let alone having a (crazy) girlfriend around 24/7 to focus and spend time with
- I have learnt about how sweet-hearted boys can be, even though he is still learning, how he is able to handle me when I am very mentally ill still blows me away
- He has learnt how difficult it can be to juggle lots of big things in his life; keeping on top of work as well as university was pretty full on, let alone having a (crazy) girlfriend around 24/7 to focus and spend time with
- I have learnt about how sweet-hearted boys can be, even though he is still learning, how he is able to handle me when I am very mentally ill still blows me away
What we've learnt about our relationship:
- Just because one of us wants alone-time, doesn't mean we hate the other
- Sometimes being in the same room as the other person but doing different things can count as spending time together
- Sometimes you have to do things that you would rather not so that you can spend time with the other person as can mean the world to them; things like running errands, watching a "girlie movie" or keeping them company in the kitchen as they cook their own food
- Sometimes you have to do things that you would rather not so that you can spend time with the other person as can mean the world to them; things like running errands, watching a "girlie movie" or keeping them company in the kitchen as they cook their own food
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Is it all worth it?
Definitely. It has certainly made things a lot easier regarding having to figure out which house to stay at, keeping in contact about what we're up to and how we're feeling, and ___.
Sure, we have seen (and you probably have too) a fair few couples who have moved in and lived together but then their relationship either crashed and burned or fizzled out; but we think we are on the right track. For both of us this is our first "proper" relationship, but it all just feels so right and that moving in was a great decision.
Fun fact; I actually asked him a year before we moved in together if he wanted to but he didn't feel ready, and looking back on it, it would have not gone very well if we did end up moving in together that year before, as neither of us would have been ready. Living together makes things so much easier, but it is also a true test of your relationship; you're forced to co-inhabit the same space and share the same things which can make the waters shaky.
Moving in together was a great decision and neither of us regret it!
Sure, we have seen (and you probably have too) a fair few couples who have moved in and lived together but then their relationship either crashed and burned or fizzled out; but we think we are on the right track. For both of us this is our first "proper" relationship, but it all just feels so right and that moving in was a great decision.
Fun fact; I actually asked him a year before we moved in together if he wanted to but he didn't feel ready, and looking back on it, it would have not gone very well if we did end up moving in together that year before, as neither of us would have been ready. Living together makes things so much easier, but it is also a true test of your relationship; you're forced to co-inhabit the same space and share the same things which can make the waters shaky.
Moving in together was a great decision and neither of us regret it!
~
Have you moved in with a partner, or significant other; how did you find that transition? OR are you about to; how do you feel about it?
- Louise x
Disclaimer: I am in a straight male-female relationship but by no means am I trying to be offensive to any LGBTQA+ couples, this blog post is purely from my own experience. If you find offence, or would like to discuss any issues please leave a comment below, or contact me on one of my social media and we can discuss privately.
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